By Leonardo Oliver Osborn
Laughter felled the room, lots of laughter indeed. But it wasn’t a whole crowd, really. It was just an insane, yet hilarious, joyfully filled laughter of one teenager, typing on his lap-top. He wore a blank white T-shirt, with a black sweat shirt, and a blue Fedora- his Trade-Mark Hat. He was white skinned, with long hair, light brown on the bottom, yet dark brown on the top.
“Aaaaannnnnd DONE!!!” he exclaimed, and laughed yet again. “Ha!!! So that’s why she wasn’t friends with him the whole Time... it turns out he was gay! Plot twist! Fantastic! I may not like the ‘Gay’ thing much, but this is takes place in the BBC universe... welp, that was another successfully-written story by yours truly!” he boasted to himself, then stretched out of his blue office chair and yawned, and took a huge gulp from his glass of orange-juice. “So... what now...?” he slowly asked himself aloud. He pondered, then an idea struck him. “Oh! I know! Jaaaaaacoooob!~” he called.
“Keine, go away.” said a a rather lower and grumpier voice from the other side of the hall.
“Oh, c’mon, dude- I promise not to trip over and throw your X-Box out the window... again...”
“No, still not trusting you.”
Leo sighed, and moved on.
“Gah! What is it, Leo!?” demanded his beloved sister.
“Ah’ got nuttin’ ta’ do... wanna hang out and watch one of your DVDs?”
“No! You already broke most of them!”
“Oh... alright...” said Leo sadly. He walked back into his room. His little Brother sat on his desk, a small lad he was, with short brown hair, and wore a Creeper T-shirt. He was fixated on a small I-Phone. “Hey Sam,” said Leonardo, tilting his head to see the little screen. “Watcha’ doin’...?” he asked in his Izabelle-impression. Sam said nothing. “Hellllloooo.....? Doh....” he walked away to the living-room. He now had only one choice... to watch television... on his own...
(Wait for it to start)
“Boring... boring... boring... Oh...! Nah, boring...” Leonardo channel-surfed, flipping through channel after channel.
“Honey, why won’t you consider taking a walk?” asked his Mother.
“No, Ma’! I already did that!” He exclaimed. He turned some channels some more... until...
'Are you tired of just watching T.V., having absolutely NOTHING to do?'
“Yes! Yes I do!”
'No walking? No family or friends to hang out with...? Not even donating anything to our sca- I mean charity...?'
“Yes! Yes! Ye- wait... what...?”
'Then you’ll need; THE TO-DO LIST 5,000!!! All you have to do is buy THIS specially branded note-pad that we did NOT just put a different cover on it for just $24.99, and a free specially branded pen for just $24.99 as well! Did you know that most stores usually sell these things for $50.00? That’s way to expensive! We sell this at a completely different price, of just $24.99 for the special note-pad and just $24.99 for the special pen! Call now, and we’ll give you a special eraser for absolutely FREE if you’ll just donate $50.00 to our charity for... um...-'
'-Bald people! Just call 1-800-randomlyandcartoonymadeupnumber and order now!'
“YES!!!” Exclaimed Leonardo, and already grabbed the phone. “Hello...? Yes... I’ll like to buy the To-Do list 4,000...? I mean 5,000... yes... in five seconds...? Right after I finish the phone call...? Kay, my parents’ credit card number is ***-***-***... kay’, thanks, bye!” he hung up, and sighed. “Good grief... good thing I speak Chipmunk-gibberish! Now... when is it gonna’-”
Knock, knock, knock
Before he could even finish, there was already a knock on the door. “- oh! There it is!” he happily said. He walked over to the door and answered it, and there it was!
“Yes, kay’, thanks’, bye!” he shut the door before the Mann even finish. He looked at the box, his face filled with joy... but then something dawned on him... “Wait a sec’!” he cried and opened the door. “Wait just a second... I forgot the sign the papers!” he exclaimed, and boped his head with his palm. “Pft, dah!”
He did so, and slammed the door, then hopped onto the couch to open it, already filled with glee. “Ah... there it is... a new Fez! It’s a thing I wear now... Fezzes are cool... oh, and the cool To-Do thingy!” he opened it, and had his new 'Special' pen ready... but then nothing came to him...
“Three hundred... four hundred... five hundred... six hundred... the bills just keep adding up...” slowly said Leonardo’s Mother, scanning through her credit card bills.
“What’s the matter, Ma’?” asked Leonardo over the couch.
“Oh... just bills... lots of them... I don’t recall spending a whole hundred in a whole day!” his Mother explained.
“Wait... a whole hundred...?” he slowly asked, this becoming far too familiar.
“Yes, a whole hundred! I just simply have idea how this could even happen... it’s like someone has been using my credit card number behind my back...” she slowly said, a suspicious look on her face.
“Oh... um... heh, heh, yeah... funny...” Leonardo slowly replied as he slowly realized what he had done.
“Yes... yes it is...” his Mother slowly replied with the same expression. She walked off, little did she know of the huge shadow of gilt that slowly fell upon her Fedora-obsessed Son. He looked up into the air with a face filled with panic, his face pale.
“... crape... welp, that's a thing...” he slowly said, and took another sip of orange juice.
His Mother ran her thoughts over about the mystery of the doubled credit-card bill over with his Father. And his Brother, Jacob, was there too. Unlike Leonardo, he’s usually good at this kind of stuff, which is why he’s been quite helpful at Times like these.
“Hey... um... excuse me...” he slowly said, and tapped his Father’s shoulder.
“What is it now, Leonardo?” asked his Father.
“Um... about the credit-card bills...” he slowly said with hesitation. “I might of... used... your credit-card number... ***-***-***... to buy stuff... a lot of stuff...” Leo confessed. Everyone turned silent.
“You did... what...!?” asked Jacob. “Gah! Dunkoff!” he exclaimed with a face palm. Leonardo’s parents started to scold him, and while they did something dawned upon Jacob. “V’ait a second...” he slowly said. “Mutter!"
Leonardo’s Mother turned. “What!?” she asked, her face obviously showing how frustrated she was.
“Leonardo did say ***-***-***, ja'?” he asked.
“Ah... yeah...?” Leonardo replied.
“V’ell, that seems to be it! That’s not our credit card number!” he exclaimed.
“Your right Jacob...” Leonardo’s Father agreed. “It’s actually-”
Exclaimed Leonardo’s Mother and Jacob, both cupping his’ mouth shut.
“Don’t tell him!” exclaimed Leonardo’s Mother. Leonardo couldn’t help but chuckle, heck, he could never really help it... “Wait...” said Leonardo’s Mother. “If that’s the case... then why did the bills randomly go up in the fir-”
Before she could finish, the door-bell rang. She answered the door.
“Here’s your year-supply of candals in all scents, Ma’am.” said the delivery boy.
“Oh... that’s why... I forgot I ordered that five years ago...” she slowly said. The candals were so expensive, so she had to order them with the ‘Snail-Mail’.
“So...” Said Leonardo. “I’m not grounded?” he asked.
“That depends, did you still use somebody else’s credit card number without permission...?” she asked with a raised eye-brow. He opened his mouth to say something, but went silent...
One Week of Being Grounded Later
“Aaaaaand that’s the last one!” Leonardo exclaimed, checking off the last idem... with his lap-top, instead of the new note-pad. He licked the envelope closed, and looked away with a disgusted look and shuttered because he had to lick it. He put on a white buttoned shirt with a light green tie, wetted his hair to brush it back... and put on the Fedora back on... and headed out the door on his way to his nighor’s house.
In a dark room, there stood three individuals. One Mann, one Woman, and a little boy, the two Boys wearing a tux, and the Woman wearing a dark black dress with a pearl necklace. In the center of the room was a steel trash can with a warm fire.
“Why... oh why have we become so poor...?” asked the Woman.
“... I... I don’t know, my love...” said the Mann.
“Father... are we going to make it...” asked the soon.
“Son, no matter what, no matter what the challenge; we will always-”
There came a knock on the door.
“Honey, who could it possibly be?” asked The Mann.
“I don’t know my dearest...” answered The Woman. “Please, do answer it.” she added.
“I will... for you, my love...” slowly said The Mann with a dramatic flare. He walked over to the door... and answered it...
“Ah, hello!” greeted Leonardo with a friendly smile. “May I come in, I... may had kinda'... back-stabbed you... and I’m here to make up for it!” he explained.
“Oh, why; come on in.” said the Mann casually. He gestured Leo to enter, and he did.
“Wow... the place seems kinda... dark...” Leonardo commented. “Been awhile sense you guys did that... anyway, heres the thing.” he continued. “I... may had... kinda’ used your credit-card number to buy stuff...” he said, the family gasped. “Yes, I know; it was-”
“And simply evil!” said The Mann, The Woman, then their Son.
“Yeah, yeah, all those things (I was jus' gonna’ say ‘mean’; but I’ll just go with that too). So... I sold all the useless stuff I’ve bought from those infomercials and E-Bay, and got all the moneys back!” he explained, and held out an envelop. “Here... this is all your money back...” he said, and handed The Mann the envelop.
“Why... that’s wonderful...” said The Mann. “We thank you, we ever so thank you! We... we needed that... we really did...”
“We were going to buy a hot-tub for our new living room!” exclaimed The Woman. The Son turned the lights back on, revealing a very clean and expensive looking room, then turned off what was actually an electric fire on the fake metal trash-can.
“Thank you kindly, sir... we have no idea what we could do without you...” said The Son.
“No problem, I figured you guys really needed that... really... really needed that...” he said slightly awkwardly, now remembering how rich this family was. “Welp, see ya later!” he said with a smile and a wave, and left the door.
“... that shirt looked quite a bit rinkeled, and it has Dog hair on it...! But he still looked rather dashing in it, with the tie to as well.” said The Woman, voicing out her opinion out-loud.
“Father, shall we order our new hot-tub and pass the Time by watching UPlifting on our flat-screened telle'...?” asked The Son.
“Indeed we will, Son- indeed we will.” answered The Mann.
“I love being rich...” said The Woman with a warm smile.
Leonardo sat on his desk once more, slouching on his office-chair. He checked the calender, the date marking 'Saturday' once more. He grinned, cracked his knouckles, and pulled his lap-top up, and wrote yet another story...
All My Best,
-Leonardo Oliver Osborn